Sunday, May 13, 2012

pseudo smile

I think you can tell that it's fake, but we both know it's expected.
My smile isn't real today.

The overcompensation in my voice,
the quasi-excuses,
all a ploy...
so that I can be alone.

Why aren't we allowed to be alone once in a while?
Why can't we have a day where we're sad? Why must people "cheer" us up?
Is there cheer in sorrow?

Life, has both bitter and sweet days, moments, experiences...
each one momentous and worthy of the feelings it generates.

To ignore, to dwell, to obsess- are all dangerous actions
But how about just feeling a real emotion, is that dangerous too?

I believe that human beings are socialized to personify perfection.
A life without pain, a meritocracy, a utopia...
But outside of the this dream, once the dust settles,
lies a reality far different than the one we paint for ourselves.

Today I'm smiling with my mouth, a broad grin, but my eyes remain transfixed ...
they are indicative of my soul, and cannot feign anything.

But we both know, that even if you noticed, you'd pretend you didn't ....
because today is a happy day, right?

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